Facebook share Tweet This Email this
Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin
As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin
I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out
where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
- George Carlin
The reason I talk to myself is because
I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
- George Carlin
Please sign-up for my Free Inspirational Daily Email on the form below.
If a man smiles all the time,
he's probably selling something that doesn't work.
- George Carlin
Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
- George Carlin
So far, this is the oldest I've been.
- George Carlin
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
then I'd have to say that the universe
aimed rather low and settled for very little.
- George Carlin
One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
I don't like to think of laws
as rules you have to follow,
but more as suggestions.
- George Carlin
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin
The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American
recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin
I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
- George Carlin
If it requires a uniform, it's a worthless endeavor.
- George Carlin
Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin
Honesty may be the best policy,
but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination,
dishonesty is the second-best policy.
- George Carlin
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- George Carlin
Inside every cynical person,
there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
- George Carlin
Capitalism tries for a delicate balance:
It attempts to work things out so that
everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from
getting violent and trying to take other people's stuff.
- George Carlin
Lord, grant that I might not so much
seek to be loved as to love.
- St. Francis of Assisi
A new command I give you: Love one another.
As I have loved you, so you must love one another.
- Jesus of Nazareth (John 13:34)
If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one.
- Mother Teresa
Do not let Sunday be taken from you.
If your soul has no Sunday, it becomes an orphan.
- Albert Schweitzer
If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need
but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him?
- 1 John 3:17
A common denominator of all religions is that
they have the power to bring out the best and the worst in people.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The first question which the priest and the Levite asked was:
"If I stop to help this man, what will happen to me?"
But... the good Samaritan reversed the question:
"If I do not stop to help this man, what will happen to him?"
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
The essence of all religions is one.
Only their approaches are different.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
- The Bible
We can never be the better for our religion
if our neighbor is the worse for it.
- Anonymous
I love you when you bow in your mosque,
kneel in your temple, pray in your church.
For you and I are sons of one religion,
and it is the Spirit.
- Khalil Gibran
To everything there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die.
- Ecclesiastes 3:1
Compassion and generosity must be the heart of any true religion.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Humility is not thinking less of yourself,
it's thinking of yourself less.
- Rick Warren (author of The Purpose Driven(R) Life)
I distrust those people who know so well
what God wants them to do,
because I notice it always coincides
with their own desires.
- Susan B. Anthony
Let us touch the dying, the poor,
the lonely and the unwanted
according to the graces we have received
and let us not be ashamed
or slow to do the humble work.
- Mother Teresa
When an inner situation is not made conscious,
it appears outside as fate.
- Carl Jung
Forgive Your Brother from Your Heart.
- Matthew 18:21-22
The mystery of the beginning
of all things is insoluble by us;
and I for one, must be content to remain an agnostic.
- Charles Darwin
Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
- St. Francis of Assisi
Sunday clears away the rust of the whole week.
- Joseph Addison
You have heard that it was said,
"Love your neighbor and hate your enemy."
But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.
- Matthew 5:43-44
The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie,
deliberate, contrived and dishonest,
but the myth, persistent, persuasive and unrealistic.
- John F. Kennedy
Ask and it will be given to you;
seek and you will find;
knock and the door will be opened to you.
- Matthew 7:7
I reject any religious doctrine that does not appeal
to reason and is in conflict with morality.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
What people believe prevails over the truth.
- Sophocles
If you have a particular faith or religion,
that is good. But you can survive without it.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
We can allow satellites, planets, suns, universe,
nay whole systems of universes, to be governed by laws,
but the smallest insect, we wish
to be created at once by special act.
- Charles Darwin
Christmas waves a magic wand over this world,
and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.
- Norman Vincent Peale
Our Lord has written the promise of the resurrection,
not in books alone, but in every leaf in spring-time.
- Martin Luther
Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
- St Francis of Assisi
You hold onto religion, you know,
rules, regulations, traditions.
I think what God is interested in
is people's hearts, and that's hard enough.
- Bono
The miracle is not that we do this work,
but that we are happy to do it.
- Mother Teresa
The function of prayer is not to influence God,
but rather to change the nature of the one who prays.
- Soren Kierkegaard
Re-examine all that you have been told...
dismiss that which insults your soul.
- Walt Whitman
Love one another.
- Jesus of Nazareth
Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls.
- Mother Teresa
When we blindly adopt a religion,
a political system, a literary dogma,
we become automatons. We cease to grow.
- Anais Nin
My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
We must respect the other fellow's religion,
but only in the sense and to the extent
that we respect his theory that
his wife is beautiful and his children smart.
- H. L. Mencken
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson
Science gives man knowledge, which is power;
religion gives man wisdom, which is control.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
A new friend is like new wine;
when it has aged you will drink it with pleasure.
- Ecclesiastes 9:10
We are all pencils in the hand of God.
- Mother Teresa
Comfort and prosperity have never enriched
the world as much as adversity has.
- Billy Graham
Thank you for visiting: Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man by George Carlin.
Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.
You can also search my large collection of Positive Motivational and Inspirational Quotes and Sayings.
May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other
specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.
You may read about our disclaimer, privacy policy, terms of use, participation in affiliate programs, copyright policy, and republishing policy.